I have doubted if I should stay with my doctor since her initial recommendation. I kept going back and forth and still am. When I spoke with my doctor's nurse the week of December 21st, I decided maybe we would continue with her because The Source doctor we spoke to and her information lined up, but then when I actually saw my doctor, it no longer did.
The impression that I was given by her nurse is that it would be a consultation appointment to ask all our questions, now that we are calm and thinking clearly. It was not at all that way. She was running an hour late, rushed through all the normal checks and did not even ask if I had questions.
She basically was still encouraging us to chose abortion, at least that's how I took it. She asked if we were sure about moving forward with "this." If we had really thought about what this was going to do to our family. She said she would walk through this with us, if we chose to do so, but it surely did not feel that way.
Honestly, I left pretty angry. Was that my clear answer I had been asking for?
Over these last few weeks, I have been encouraged to see my doctor one more time after our specialist appointment. Maybe it was a bad day? Maybe I just need to be better about interrupting her and asking my questions, even if I am not asked first? I have been given great care by my doctor in the past with Cole and Claire. I am just hoping that does not change just because our baby has been given such a diagnosis. I want her to be given the same great treatment.
Our specialist appointment {January 7th} went very well. We were pleased with the care we were given. It was at the hospital with the Maternl Fetal Specialist from UTMB. The technician was very friendly and made sure we were okay throughout the ultrasound. Then the OB specialist came in to talk with us. It's like going to the dentist. The tech did all the work and the doctor just confirmed what she did {and what our doctor told us}.
We were then moved across the hall to speak with someone else. I think she was a genetic counselor, but honestly, I don't know her title. She was very kind and told us this part could be as long or short as we wanted it to be. We were able to ask a ton of our questions and she gave us information that maybe we had not thought of yet. She also told us I was welcome to come back every six weeks if I would like and would tell our doctor so.
Most importantly, she was another person who encouraged me about my doctor. She said it was important that we had good communication. That my doctor would tell me what she could do, but I also needed to be open with her about what I needed as well. If it's seeing me more often, then tell her that. But it's a two way street and it is very important throughout this process.
My next appointment with my doctor is Thursday {January 17th}. Will you pray with me that my answer will finally be clear about whether I should stay or change doctors? Will you pray that I am bold and ask all my questions? That I am honest about where we are coming from and what I need from her? Our desire is to receive the same great medical care as I received with my other two children or BETTER! I know she told us that our baby will not live BUT she does not have the final say. Only OUR GOD knows.
6 comments:
I will definitely be praying for complete clarity for you & Brent!
And if there is ANYTHING at all that I can do for you,
please do not hesitate to contact me!
You are in my thoughts and prayers every single day!
I will definitely pray for y'all to have clarity about your doctor. Definitely try to talk to her but if she is still rushing you and obviously showing you that she disagrees then get a new doctor.
Get the best care!
Absolutely!
Praying hard for Thursday!!
Dear Leigh Ann & Brent, Sweetie, I haven't stopped praying...first thing in the morning, last thing at night. The photos of you painting were such a blessing. Your eyes were twinkling and your smile was full...I wondered if you would stay with this doctor or not. She may have personal reasons she has to work through to care for you, but that is on her, not you. But you have the right to ask her if she wants to continue, if not, can she recommend someone...and I continue to pray. Love, Beth
I am praying for you in this! I encourage you to tell your doctor exactly what you and Brent need from her and ask her if she feels she can give that to you. I pray that God gives you not only clarity, but peace as well and boldness! God's blessings!
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